Happy September!
I love September because I was born in this great month. :)
But this month also represents a rebirth for me. It was a year ago that I knew that my failed marriage and upcoming divorce wouldn't break me.
My life was a wreck or so I thought it was. I had been living in a house with a man that I vowed to love forever and ever and we were sleeping in separate rooms. A few months prior, it had been decided that we couldn't make it work. We couldn't fix it. There was an emotional disconnect. There was a physical disconnect. We were disconnected, period.
I had prayed and I had prayed and I had prayed.
When the decision was first made to end the marriage, I believe I was the saddest I've ever been in my life. I cried. I cried and I cried.
I attempted to conceal the hurt that filled my body and mind, and I think I did pretty good. Nobody wants to walk around showing that they are full of hurt, pain and sadness. I would only cry in private, but I would cry.
And the reason I tell you my state of mind is because I can now look back to last year and say I was nearly destroyed.
Hello my name is Darlene and my divorce nearly destroyed me. :)
But I'm most thankful that the feeling of my life being destroyed didn't last long.
I don't want to go to church but I gotta stop by for a second. Thank you Jesus. Thank you Jesus. Thank you Jesus.
But because my Heavenly Father knew that his child was in pain, he made sure that people in my life stepped up.
My father would want me to check in daily and if I wouldn't, he would call me.
"How are you Darlene?" I would hear on the other end of the phone.
My father is a man of few words, so this is sooooo major. For him to actually call and then actually talk. Oh, major. :)
It was also right about this time when my sister started inviting me over every Sunday for dinner. She wanted to see my face. She wanted to make sure I was OK.
I would sit and talk with her and this is my oldest sister, so of course sometimes I would cry with her. Now, I look forward to our Sunday dinners.
My bf would surprise me with phone calls with invitations to do something, anything. She would make up stuff to do to just be doing something.
My other gf would want to meet at our favorite wing spot.
My nephew and his wife, my neice, would call and text more than usual.
Other friends and family members would make their presence known in my life.
My family and friends showed up in a major way for me and I love them, love them, love them.
But one of the turning points that happened last year at this time was my neice decided that we would go on a cruise for my birthday. Sept. 28th! I was turning... LOLOLOLOL
She is part of a travel club and needed to use one of her trips.
I was excited to death. I had never been on a cruise so....
I was soooo happy to be going on the cruise with her but I was soooo happy that she would think of her aunt (we are 9 years apart) who is going through a divorce to take. :)
Once on the cruise, I remember sitting in our room. She looked at me and said, "I thought you were going to be sad. I didn't know how you were going to be, auntie."
I was still sad but it wasn't that pitiful sadness anymore.
And plus I had my family and my friends so I wasn't destroyed and being on the cruise with her actually having a good time was proof that I wasn't really destroyed.
And I was praying, whew I was praying.
And oh yea, I aint gonna lie. I was drinking Patron :)
But as I welcome September, I couldn't help but think about my life just a year ago.
I smile but my heart also smiles.
Whew, what a different a year can make!
I'm soooooo happy to be part of a family and friend network that helped me through one of the most difficult and unhappy times in my life.
Do you find that it is your family and friends who help you through difficult times? Has a family member or friend done something that made you feel sooo much better? Do you often reach out to your family and friends when you know they are going through a rough patch?
Share your comments here or e-mail me at choosingmrwrong@gmail.com.
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