Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Another Wedding And More Tears

Labor Day weekend is a popular weekend for weddings and like most years I had one to attend this year.

I had been waiting on the big day with much anticipation and enthusiasm because one of my gfs who was a member of the Divorce Club had decided to do it again.

She joined the club a few years before I did. I vividly remember the day I learned that she and her husband were heading to Splitsville. Like most divorcees, she was devastated.

We talked daily about many, many, many things after the divorce and I believe our relationship grew stronger than ever.

Her relationship with Christ is integral in her life so I knew she would be just fine. Praying folk are strong folk :)

Any who.

I remember on the day of her divorce, I took her a small plant and a card. In the card, I told her she was like the plant and as it grows, it will be symbolic of the growth she will experience in her life.

And she grew and grew and grew.

As I watched her vow to love who I believe to be the true love of her life, I got ready to cry. Tears were standing in my eyes.

The pastor talked of the man being the head of his household, but not as a boss but as a spiritual leader and looking to his helpmate along the way. He talked about everyone at the service doing everything that they can to make sure that the couple's love grows.

All that is what I expected to hear -- the same ole, same ole.

When they exchanged their vows, they promised to each other that they would pick each other up when they were down. This, too, is typical to hear but something about it hit me.

Once again, tears were standing in my eyes, but just standing. Those words tugged at my heart in a major way because that is a BIG responsibility. That is an awesome task.

But then there was time for prayer, and this is when I put in work.

Sometimes, yea I admit it, when there’s a prayer led by a pastor I’m not putting my all into it. Actually, I do my best praying when nobody else is talking or leading it.

Not this time, though.

I heard the pastor for like a second and then I got bizzy. Whew, I really prayed. I prayed real hard for my gf and the love of her life. And I didn't pray that their love would stay the same. I prayed that it would grow and flourish and that they would figure out a way to nurture the love that they currently feel. That's when the tears rolled.

But after the ceremony was over and it was time for the reception, I couldn’t help but think about how much courage it takes to vow to love like that again.

I can easily answer the question about if I would want another wedding. That’s a big fat, obese NO. But to each their own.

But those vows are a dooosy. Whew, those vows are a doooosy, so I’m still on the fence trying to figure out if my heart has the capacity to do that again.

You have to trust that person with everything in you. After all, you can’t love if you don’t trust. Can I really trust someone with my inner most thoughts, feelings, likes, dislikes, hurts, desires and dreams again without holding back?

Can I trust that someone is being honest. That they have good intentions? Can I trust that they do not have any ill will toward me. Can I trust that deep down that they are not mean and will not become cruel and nasty in the not so distant future? Wheeeew!

I dunno.

That type of trust is earned, and I’m over the moon happy that my gf found someone who earned her trust and her heart again. She soooo deserves all that is great and greater from love.

Share your comments or e-mail me choosingmrwrong@gmail.com.

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