Are You In A 'Better Than Nothing' Relationship?

We've all said it at one time or another: It's better than nothing.

If you have an older car and want that new luxury truck or car, you likely have reminded yourself that it's better than nothing!

If you have a job that you hate going to each morning, you likely have said to yourself that it's better than nothing!

I get it but since embarking on my journey as a relationship coach, I have aggressively pursued a greater understanding of things that may happen in relationships. Part of being a coach -- a good coach -- is being compassionate and sensitive to things that others share with me.

I am finding that there is a lot of it's better than nothing and/or he or she is the best I have ever had when it comes to relationships (even though many needs are going unmet).

The better than nothing is that person who meets our immediate emotional and physical needs. We know deep down that this person does not have long-term goals for us but we convince ourselves that it is better than nothing. Even if the person has long-term goals for us, he or she lacks many qualities and personality traits that we would like to have in a mate, but we end up in a unhappy situation.

My personal relationship journey has never taken me down It's Better Than Nothing Boulevard. I have always had choices so anybody I have ever dealt with that I kinda put in the what was I thinking category wasn't because he was better than nothing. I have had a few lapse in judgment, too. I I have definitely been on: Let Me Try To Change Him Lane, If I Could Just Get Him To See Street and I Can Make This Work Way, so I am not judging anyone's journey.

But when we have an older car that may be giving us mechanical problems, we work hard to get a new one, right? When we hate our jobs, we submit resumes endlessly until we land a new job? Hopefully, one with better hours and increased pay.

In relationships, I am finding that we do not put in work for the best possible result. We do not aspire for more. We will ride around in a "bucket" of a relationship but want to drive a luxury vehicle. We will trust a loser with our hearts and the possibility for abundant love, happiness and satisfaction.

I understand that there is a deep human desire for companionship. It is deeeeeep! We want to be touched. We want to be listened to. We want to talk. We want to give love. We want to receive love. We want to share our lives with someone. We want to have sex.

But at what cost? How many years will you waste on someone who does not have any future planned with you? How much pain and heartache will you experience with someone who is reckless with your heart? Someone who doesn't care about your feelings? How many more tears will you shed unnecessarily?

You are better than a going nowhere, raggedy, issue-filled relationship. You are better than that!