I looked down at my phone and saw a message from someone I was dating.
"I should just post that video of you for saying that!"
I thought my heart jumped out my chest. But it actually fell into my tummy. And I'm no nurse or doctor but my heart rate quadrupled.
Yea, we had been engaged in a difference of opinions. It really wasn't an argument because there was no yelling. Remember, we were texting. I was trying to make a point about the way he responds to situation, but when I looked at my phone and saw that text, I was OUT DONE! I couldn't believe that he actually sent that message to me. Heck, I couldn't believe that he actually thought about humiliating me.
I've blogged about sexting and sending nude photos. And most peeps agree that sending a nude photo with your head cut off is OK. And nope I didn't think anything was really wrong with it, either. Honestly, I found it a bit titilating, fun and exciting. And I would really be doing a disservice if I left out that it is foreplay. And heck that has to be the most exciting part about sending a sexually suggestive text, photo or video, but errr uhhh I have changed my mind.
Recently, I found myself threatened and humiliated about a video that I made. Nah, that I starred in. LOLOLOLOL, yea, I'm laffin to keep from cryin... But seriously, I want others to learn from my mistake.
I had gone to a gentleman's club on a Saturday night after an evening on the town having fun, big fun.
After one girl finishes her routine, I turn to the guy and say, "I'm going to dance like that for you when we get home." And I did. And he videotaped it.
At the time, I wasn't thinking that maybe he would threaten to show it off on Facebook one day. I'm not famous. You can't make any money off of it, sooooo what would be the point of showing anyone else the video? I thought he just wanted it for himself.
He hasn't put the video online yet, but ladies and yes, gentleman, it was a very scary feeling. I've been through some shiggidy with mean things being said before but I have never had something give me this feeling in the pit of my stomach. It was a humiliating feeling to have someone threaten to reveal to the world something that I did in the privacy of my own home.
Sooooo ladies and ummm gents too, you may think that the person you are sending photos and videos to will never share it with anyone. I did too, but he not only threatened once but two times to do it soooooo one never really knows what another is capable of doing. And yea, I'm mad at him, but I'm made at myself more.
I love Sanford and Son, love it, and everytime I think about what I have done, I say, "Youuuuu biiiiig dummmmmy!"
Have you ever made a sex tape or sexually suggestive tape and had someone threaten to post it online or share with others? What would make a person do that? Tell me.
The person who takes a private moment and makes it public is clearly the lowest sort of scum, but only a fraction lower than the sort of scum who threatens to do it. I can see being embarrassed about having trusted someone so low--but no one should EVER be embarrassed about being a sexual person and enjoying sex. Yes, you might not choose to have that moment shared with everyone, but the fact that you HAD such a moment--where you enjoyed your sexuality--is nothing to feel self-conscious about.
ReplyDeleteIt's not a viable threat if you realize that posting it publicly is a reflection on him, and what a low-life he is--and it is not a reflection on you. People who know you and care about you will know that you aren't some type of exhibitionist (and won't care if you are, as long as you are still a good person!) They will know you trusted the wrong person, and they'll know you learn from your mistakes. The opinion or reaction of anyone else just doesn't matter--what do you care what THEY think?