I'm Addicted To Newness

We all like new stuff.

We ooh and ahh over new shoes, jeans, suits and dresses.

We feel special when we put on that new outfit and it looks oooh sooooo good.

Shoot, sometimes after getting a new hair style I may stare into the mirror a little longer believing that Darlene is the answer to the question asked of the mirror. You know the one. "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the loveliest of them all?"

When babies are born, people flock to the hospital. We have to see the newborn. The parents are so proud that they carry around more photos than people really want to see. They want to show off the new member of the family.

When couples finally take the plunge, ummm I mean get married, they enter into the newlywed stage. And they enjoy each other's company on a whole 'nother level. They move into a new home. They start co-mingling two lives. It's exciting to say my wife or my husband or tell people my new last name is...

But what about the newness of a relationship?

One of my gfs called me this morning and said, "What do you do when someone doesn't act like they are excited to see you anymore?"

Wow!

"Well, you tell him that you better start acting like you excited to see me," I said. "And tell him now because if you wait too long it will sound more like a complaint. And the longer you wait the angrier you will get."

I continued, "But that's why it is important to constantly remind a person with the things you say and do that they are important to you. Guuurrl, they ain't lie when they said relationships are work. They are work."

But then I tell her about a guy who told me that he can't wait to see me again.

"You see in the beginning, everything is love. You can't get enough. The true test is trying to sustain a relationship. To keep it fun. To keep it exciting (and not just in the bedroom)."

She responded, "I like that newness."

"Yea, we all do, but the newness can't last. It's just something to build on."

"Well, I'm addicted to that newness. I like that feeling. You meet a guy and everything is wonderful for six months. And then you meet another guy and everything is wonderful for another six months," she said and laughed.

I know that my gf doesn't really want to be going in and out of relationships every six months, but her feelings about newness and the excitment of a new relationship is likely shared by a lot of people.

When people don't work at relationships, the relationship dies.

The same type of thing happens at work. If you don't perform well you get called into the office and let go.

Sometimes when people say relationships are work, I think they mean it negatively. But the negativity is going to manifest itself sooner or later.

Working at a relationship provides many rewards. Your mate will feel good and in turn treat you good. Good times to be had by all!

After you've put in the hours of work with your employer, you want your paycheck, right?

I believe if you put in your work in your relationship with the right one, the benefits are unending and satisfying.

Share your thoughts with me here or e-mail me at choosingmrwrong@gmail.com. Are you addicted to newness? When you say relationships are work, are you thinking negatively? Do you try to make your mate feel good so that he or she will do the same in return?